I’m Not Trying to Be Impolite. I’m Shy

Navigating work and social situations with anxiety

Photo by Chen Yi Wen on Unsplash

I’ve always been shy. When I started at a new school where I didn’t know anyone, I could go entire days without speaking. People assured me that I’d “grow out of” my shyness.

But as I grew older, the shyness remained. It turns out that my inability to talk to new people, or go to new places by myself without shaking with fear, was caused by anxiety.

May is National Mental Health Awareness Month, which seems a fitting time to talk about my struggles with anxiety.

I’ve written about it before, especially the lightbulb moment when I realized how much anxiety was controlling my life.

Anxiety Can Make You Feel Inadequate. You’re Not.

For years, I had trouble talking to teachers. Then I had disastrous job interviews. In one job I managed to get, I had my six-month review and my boss said, “You’re very quiet.” She paused and said, “But that’s your personality. Your performance has been excellent.”